Women in Academia
“Staying occupied is a socially sanctioned way
of remaining distant from our pain.”
My life is deadlines, expectations, and trying to get to the next thing.
The goalposts keep moving. As soon as I feel like I’ve had a win, the criteria for success change.
Nothing is ever enough.
I am worried someone will find out one day that I don’t belong here. They will discover the dummy that I am, and I’ll be outed.
It will probably happen in class, in front of my cohort. Or when I’m giving that job talk at my dream school.
I’ve always relied on my logic. If I’m so smart, how come it doesn’t feel like it? How come I can’t figure out how to feel happier?
Things are moving so fast, there’s so much pressure, and I’m not enjoying my life anymore.
I started this program to make a difference, but I’m so far from that goal it doesn’t feel worth continuing sometimes.
The politics in this department are stifling… Who can I talk to and trust?
Isolated. Discouraged. Excited. I’m on a roller coaster.
Everyone around me has it figured out. They don’t struggle as I do.
My work is all-consuming. When I’m working, I doubt myself. When I’m not working, I feel guilty.
I’m out of balance.
I’m beyond burnt out, but I can’t quit.
Just one more sentence, one more page. I’m stuck in a tunnel and feel like a zombie.
I dream of the day when this isn’t my life, but it is hard to envision.
I want to get drunk and smoke a pack of cigarettes… anything to feel differently than I do right now. Anything to turn off the loud voice in my brain that’s yelling, “You’ll never make it!”
The grind. When will I earn the chance to take a breath?
I have been there. The confusion. The pressure.
In the seven years I spent preparing for my ideal job – a top researcher at a prestigious university – I was consumed with anxiety, stress, and doubt.
My negative coping behaviors took a toll. I was plagued with insomnia, insecurity, and imposter syndrome.
I fantasized about running away to another life that was simple and free.
With my experience and training, I can help you regain your footing and find clarity in your purpose and path. You’ve been shouldering all this suffering on your own, but you don’t have to keep doing it.
Together, we will identify where your insecurities and unhappiness are originating. You’ll dust the cobwebs off your power and reclaim your life.
Let’s connect today so that you can feel less like some paper-writing robot and more like your dynamic, joyful self.
Call me today at (512) 761-8712 to schedule your free, 20-minute initial consultation.